Indiana Jones Vs. Han Solo: Character Cage Match
Posted 09.18.12 by Mandy
Harrison Ford has played many characters in his long career, but probably his two most iconic roles are the scruffy smuggler Han Solo and the archeology professor Indiana Jones. With the complete Indiana Jones series released on Blu-ray this week, we thought we’d find out what would happen if the two characters went toe-to-toe in a cage match.
The Rules: These guys are identical in terms of height, weight and strength, though Indy (from Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade ) is a little older than Han (from Star Wars: Episode V – The Empire Strikes Back). Then again, it’s not the years; it’s the mileage. This one will probably be more of a duel, seeing as both guys will come in with whatever weapons they always have on them. That means Indy will have a bull whip and a pistol, while Han Solo will, of course, have a blaster at his side.
Indy’s Biggest Strength: Ordinarily, Indy’s charm is his most powerful weapon, but it’s doubtful it’ll work well on Mr. Solo. Perhaps all the coeds that have a crush on Professor Jones — who will inevitably surround the octagon — will be able to distract Han for long enough to give Indiana the advantage.
Other Strengths: He may remember how to pull a still-beating heart from a person’s chest, and let’s not forget that he’s taken a swig from the Holy Grail.
Indy’s Greatest Weakness: He hates snakes, but there shouldn’t be any of those in the octagon.
Han’s Biggest Strength: No doubt about it, Han is the bigger scoundrel of the two characters. This could be a significant advantage when it comes to the big fight since Han will have fewer ethical reservations about what he does in the ring.
Other strengths: Those nerf-herding skills could come in handy, and don’t forget: Han isn’t afraid to shoot first.
Han’s Greatest Weakness: Han could easily get distracted if Indy insults the Millennium Falcon, and he could end up bragging about the Kessel Run as Indy draws his weapon.
If you’d like to give a blow by blow of how you think the battle would play out, feel free to use our comments section to hash out the minutiae of the match.
Photos Courtesy Lucasfilm, Twentieth Century Fox, and Paramount