The Eleven Best Accessorized Men in History
09.02.14 by Mandy
Everyone has heard the expression “Clothes make the man”, but a few really insightful guys know the truth: accessories make the man. So here’s our list of the very best accessorized men we’ve ever seen. Because any guy can wear a suit and tie, but it takes a real man to wear a giant scarf, half a dozen necklaces, and a wrist-ful of bracelets all at the same time.
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Ivan the Terrible
This sixteenth-century czar has a truly terrible reputation for bursts of anger and outbreaks of mental illness, but this guy definitely knew that there was more to an outfit that a shirt and some pants. From fur-lined hats and ornate brocade cloaks to scepters and truly incredible shoes, Ivan would never have been seen wearing ordinary clothes. We think we might just start referring to him as Ivan the Fabulous.
Richie Marcello the Treasure King
Richie Marcello is best known as a dealer and avid collector of movie memorabilia, and apparently he collects hats, vests, necklaces and rings as well. Richie’s accessory wardrobe is truly something to behold, and you can see it all when his show, Treasure King, comes back to REELZ Wednesday, September 10th at 9:30p ET/PT.
The Marlboro Man
While the wardrobe elements are pretty basic — jeans, a button-front, long-sleeved shirt and boots — his accessories are anything but. His look always includes a cowboy hat and a belt, as well as chaps and a vest. But occasionally he'll also wear a lasso, work gloves, spurs and a jacket, and the Marlboro Man wears this overload of accessories without the accessories wearing him. Yet, at the same time, he is defined by his accessories. How can both of things be simultaneously true? Only the Marlboro Man knows for sure.
There are a few accessories that identify the wearer as being extremely wealthy, and the dapper Mr. Peanut wears them all. Not only does he sport spats and a top hat, he also includes a monocle, white gloves and a cane in his outfit. In addition to all of these accessories, this legume also always wears a grin that says he doesn't have a worry in the world, because a top hat and a smile go together like peanut butter and jelly.
Lenny always is rocking stylish clothes, but in terms of accessories he usually sticks to jewelry and sunglasses. However, every now and again this rock star is an accessory pioneer. Our favorite incidence of this is the one pictured, in which he used some bedding to keep his neck warm. Most would've called the pictured item a blanket, but Lenny Kravitz insisted that it was indeed a scarf. And that definitely puts him in the accessory hall of fame.
Not every guy can wear stockings and garters with feather bedecked hats and still ooze masculinity, but Henry VIII sure could. For Henry there was no fabric too ornate, no gold jewelry too thick and heavy, and no such thing as too much slashing and puffing in any garment, ever. For this guy more was more, and nobody succeeded with excess quite like Henry Eight.
For most guys, having green skin, orange hair, mutton chops, and a gold tooth would be enough to set him apart from the pack, but for Dr. Teeth it's just the beginning. He goes to town with his clothes too, wearing a black and red striped shirt, a pink tophat, a wide variety of scarves, vests, silk cuffs and collars, belts and fringe. Some might call it a lot of look, but the Electric Mayhem frontman calls it perfection. Can you picture that?
We're pretty sure that Steven Tyler and Dr. Teeth are kindred spirits. In fact, we wouldn’t be a bit surprised if the two were BFFs and borrowed each other’s scarves and jewelry regularly. What breaks our heart though is that since his American Idol days, Tyler is more likely to run around wearing a white pant suit and a Rachel haircut than a multi-color duster and two dozen scarves. Hopefully, he'll soon see the error of his ways and will once again look like a badass, accessory-wearing rockstar.
Viking hats. Crowns. Grills. Sunglasses. Necklaces. Rings. Top hats. Brightly colored vinyl hats. Fur coats. Did we forget anything? Oh that’s right… the giant clocks. The awesome and amazing giant clocks. When we say nobody does accessories like Flav, that is not hyperbole. Nobody accessorizes like Flavor Flav.
When most people think of Indy’s accessories, they think hat, whip, satchel, and gun, but we think Dr. Jones really gets the accessories right when he’s in professor mode. Every time that guy wears a suit he is perfectly accessorized, whether it's a gorgeous fedora worn with double-breasted overcoat perfection or the absolute best bowtie-glasses combination ever. We would definitely be writing "Love You" on our eyelids if we were enrolled in Dr. Jones' class.
The character Jack Sparrow has plenty of memorable accessories, but he has nothing on Johnny Depp, himself. Wherever Depp goes he is bound to be covered in a variety of frills and trims, and similarly, wherever he goes he will be adored by women. The return on investment for this guy's accessories is second to none, which makes Johnny Depp the crowned prince of fellas who aren't afraid to rock accessories.
Movie images courtesy New Line Cinema and Paramount Pictures.