The Big Lebowski Gets Shakespearean Treatment
01.07.10 by reelz
Via Brahsome, we learned about The Big Lebowski as written by William Shakespeare. This massive and completely necessary task was undertaken by Super-Achiever Adam Bertocci. How do some of the classic Big Lebowski lines translate?
Jesus Quintana: You said it, man. Nobody f---s with the Jesus.
QUINCE: Thou speakest rightly, sir. No man misdeals with Joshua Quince, by Jesu.
The Dude: Hey, careful, man, there's a beverage here!
THE KNAVE: I beseech ye, there is a beverage here.
Walter Sobchak: You want a toe? I can get you a toe, believe me. There are ways, Dude. You don't wanna know about it, believe me.
The Dude: Yeah, but Walter...
Walter Sobchak: Hell, I can get you a toe by 3 o'clock this afternoon... with nail polish. These f--king amateurs...
THE KNAVE: And where might a man fetch a toe?
Thou wouldst have a toe? A toe can be obtain'd.
Ways are known, Knave. Thou wilt not like to hear.
I'll have a toe for thee this afternoon
Ere singeth cockerel at three o'clock.
These amateurs would have us soil'd with fear.
Got a couple of hours? Read the entire script, Shakespeare style.