America, Don't Let Me Down Again
10.05.07 by reelz
Come on American, don't do it. You don't have to. There's better stuff to see. I know, there's not a lot out there, but surely you can find something at the video store. Maybe there's a Netflix envelope waiting in your mailbox right now. Come on, just go check. DO IT!
I know, I know. I liked Dumb and Dumber and Something About Mary too. Kingpin was hysterical. Well, if you want the Farrellys to get the hint and possibly try a little harder the next time out, you won't reward them for the debacle that is The Heartbreak Kid. Not only is it not funny (to be fair, there are a few laughs in the first 30 minutes) for the majority of its running time, but it's downright insulting. Ben Stiller has played this same role endlessly, and this just might be the most repugnent version of it yet. Just thinking about it again makes me wince.
Ghost Rider, Norbit, Wild Hogs, Halloween. We told you they sucked and you saw them anyway. And I'd wager that you probably thought they sucked too, or maybe you liked them enough at the time but forgot they existed until I just reminded you of them. Come of, think about it, they sucked!
As Hollywood makes crappier and crappier movies and I've got to see Eddie Murphy in a fat suit for the 9th time, I blame you! I saw it for free, but you put money in their pockets for that mindless drivel. Yeah, that's right, you are to blame!
But you have a chance to do the right thing now. Close that Fandango page. Or what about Across the Universe, The Kingdom or The Game Plan? They may not be great, but at least they don't have Ben Stiller picking your pockets. Heck, see Seeker. I don't even know what that movie is, but it's got to have more originality than Heartbreak Kid.